Saturday, January 21, 2012
Saturday, January 7, 2012
From the Darkness...a peek at the NL for 2012
The Hot Stove is Set on Low
Well, the Cubbies finally got a first baseman, but it ain't the dude they needed for winning the division this year. Young Rizzo the Rat has scurried from east coast to west, and now arrives in the windy city of the midwest without having played more than a handful of games in the bigs. Sounds like he'll start in AAA, which the rest of the team should probably consider doing. Especially now that Fielder won't be there to help. And regarding Prince, I still don't understand why Milwaukee doesn't just bring him back and let him be a Brewer for life. Not enough funds, my ass! If Braun really does have to sit out 50 games, then the Brew Crew is screwed. Then again, the Cards let Albert slip away and it doesn't seem to bother them much. And, somehow, they'll probably continue to make late-season playoff runs and continue to win a world series every six years or so. One can't help but wish the best for Pirates fans now that they're so close to not being losers, but where the hell is the pitching? The Reds look tougher this year with a potential pair of aces up their sleeve in Latos and Cueto. The Astros...uh....well, they might be the worst team in the majors.
Joe Torre must've read Gorilla Suitcase's observations on Epstein running the Cubs from the luxury suite, with Sveum as his puppet, as Torre suddenly resigned from his position as the Dark Lord of Disciplin to muscle his way into buying the Dodgers - the team he led to the playoffs a couple years ago (with help from Manny) - with Mattingly as his malleable padawan manager. This whole fucking thing makes me sick. I didn't watch my Rockies go 9-9 in the 2011 season series vs. their annual nemesis from Smell-A so that this fucking strumpett, this fucking whore could waltz around town owing money to everybody to pay for a corrupt organization that's been bailed out and protected on high by the Prince of Darkness himself. Add to that the contrived military jerseys and boring play of the Pads, the general fascistness of Arizona, the Giants' absolute refusal to improve their offense, and the Rox signing of play-dough (in)action figure, Michael "CudDyer Maker", for $31 million -- the NL West looks uglier than ever.
The NL East, however, could be where all the fun is for 2012. I'm shamefully eager to watch the Miami Marlins play Ozzie ball all year now that they got Big Z. And if the Nats make yet another absurdly big splash to get Prince, well then all I gotta say is 'watch out, Philly'. Even if they don't get him, that's still an 85-win ballclub. And the Braves always seem to be on the verge of greatness. Which brings us to the cellar: the Mets. What a joke. Change the dimensions of the outfield so we can help our anemic lineup hit more homers! Let Reyes sign with a division rival! Sign nobody to replace him! The Madoff-Wilpon-Katz bush-leaguers are gonna lose 100 games on CitiBank field. Ha! Laughable, man.
And most ridiculous of all, we might be there to watch one, live, at the end of our springtime journey across that crazy country of baseball.
Well, the Cubbies finally got a first baseman, but it ain't the dude they needed for winning the division this year. Young Rizzo the Rat has scurried from east coast to west, and now arrives in the windy city of the midwest without having played more than a handful of games in the bigs. Sounds like he'll start in AAA, which the rest of the team should probably consider doing. Especially now that Fielder won't be there to help. And regarding Prince, I still don't understand why Milwaukee doesn't just bring him back and let him be a Brewer for life. Not enough funds, my ass! If Braun really does have to sit out 50 games, then the Brew Crew is screwed. Then again, the Cards let Albert slip away and it doesn't seem to bother them much. And, somehow, they'll probably continue to make late-season playoff runs and continue to win a world series every six years or so. One can't help but wish the best for Pirates fans now that they're so close to not being losers, but where the hell is the pitching? The Reds look tougher this year with a potential pair of aces up their sleeve in Latos and Cueto. The Astros...uh....well, they might be the worst team in the majors.
Joe Torre must've read Gorilla Suitcase's observations on Epstein running the Cubs from the luxury suite, with Sveum as his puppet, as Torre suddenly resigned from his position as the Dark Lord of Disciplin to muscle his way into buying the Dodgers - the team he led to the playoffs a couple years ago (with help from Manny) - with Mattingly as his malleable padawan manager. This whole fucking thing makes me sick. I didn't watch my Rockies go 9-9 in the 2011 season series vs. their annual nemesis from Smell-A so that this fucking strumpett, this fucking whore could waltz around town owing money to everybody to pay for a corrupt organization that's been bailed out and protected on high by the Prince of Darkness himself. Add to that the contrived military jerseys and boring play of the Pads, the general fascistness of Arizona, the Giants' absolute refusal to improve their offense, and the Rox signing of play-dough (in)action figure, Michael "CudDyer Maker", for $31 million -- the NL West looks uglier than ever.
The NL East, however, could be where all the fun is for 2012. I'm shamefully eager to watch the Miami Marlins play Ozzie ball all year now that they got Big Z. And if the Nats make yet another absurdly big splash to get Prince, well then all I gotta say is 'watch out, Philly'. Even if they don't get him, that's still an 85-win ballclub. And the Braves always seem to be on the verge of greatness. Which brings us to the cellar: the Mets. What a joke. Change the dimensions of the outfield so we can help our anemic lineup hit more homers! Let Reyes sign with a division rival! Sign nobody to replace him! The Madoff-Wilpon-Katz bush-leaguers are gonna lose 100 games on CitiBank field. Ha! Laughable, man.
And most ridiculous of all, we might be there to watch one, live, at the end of our springtime journey across that crazy country of baseball.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)